Set Yourself Up for Success....
Make it Easier For You to Succeed
Create circumstances in which you can succeed by supporting
yourself and laying the groundwork for success. Arrange things in a
way that will support you in doing what you need to increase your happiness.
(Note that this means things that benefit you without harm or detrimental
affects to others.)
For example, if you have a goal of eating more healthy
meals, make it a point to always keep healthy ingredients on hand. Or
if you are trying to reduce your level of stress, make sure you set
aside time to do meditation or whatever approach you're using. Or if
you want a job that you like better, gather some helpful books, web
site links, sample resumes and other resources that will help spur you
on.
This is a way of supporting yourself and stacking the
deck in your favor. It involves doing what you need to do to help ensure
that you will accomplish whatever you set out to do. This could include
taking actions, carving out time in your schedule, setting boundaries
(e.g., learning to say "no" some of the time), and so on -
with the intent of supporting yourself in your intentions and goals.
Create the Perspective that
You Are Always a Success
It is very important to our mental well-being to be
able to call ourselves a success. Again, you can create odds that are
overwhelmingly in your favor - because you are in charge of your mind.
So, make a continuous assumption that you are always
a personal success. Make the distinction between you being a success
and your actions being a success. You are a success, regardless of what
you did or didn't do, what you can or cannot do. You are in the process
of life just like the rest of us, and you are a success just because
of that. You are a success if you believe you are.
Forget what the world says represents success, and make
the choice to set your own criteria for success - remembering that personal
success is independent of accomplishments in the world. Make them up
as you go. It's like asking yourself, "what am I doing right, right
now in this moment" or "what can I praise myself for right
now." This is especially important when you are feeling judgmental
about yourself, but try to adopt it as a continual way of thinking.
You can be your own cheerleader and #1 fan!
Find a way to view everything as a success. For example,
if you are one who picks up books but never seems to finish one, see
yourself as "someone who looks into a lot of books" rather
than "someone who rarely finishes a book."
Don't Let Negativity Suck You
In
Only engage in the world in ways that lift you up and
move you forward. Don't waste your time engaging in games of right/wrong
with others - or in your own head. This includes things like arguing
about who or what is "right," defending yourself against emotional
attack, listening to judgments meant to hurt you, etc. These things
only lead to the depths of judgment and pointless use of your energy.
When someone "baits" you like this, don't get sucked in. See
these actions for what they are: energy-sapping behaviors based in a
mentality of lack, fear, low self-esteem, and other negativity.
Spend Your Time Wisely on Uplifting
Pursuits
Choose your projects and endeavors wisely. For example,
choose work, reading, TV shows, movies, people, home projects, hobbies,
etc. based on how they lift you up and don't drag you down.
Choose carefully in areas where there is a choice (this
is almost everything) so that the uplifting activities outweigh the
neutral and "life-energy sapping" things that you must do
(and do what you can to eliminate the latter ones from your life).
Remember that just because you start something doesn't
mean you have to finish it. If you start a project or TV show and find
that it is bringing you down, change and do something else instead.
Guard your happiness carefully.
Hold Intentions of Good Will
Always hold an intention for good will for yourself
and for others. This means to want the best for everyone - for them
to have the experiences and lessons they need to learn and grow, to
be happier, to be better people. And remember that we don't always know
what is best for them, or what they really need. (Only Spirit knows
that.)
When you feel anger, jealousy, vengeful, etc.
- things other than good will for others - they are signs that something
within you needs attention. Pay attention and look deeper within yourself
to see what part of you needs extra love or reassurance, or how you
need to nurture yourself. Negative emotions usually mean there's some
way you need to support yourself - e.g., listen to your needs more closely,
provide healing for some emotional pain wound, release judgments against
yourself, accept yourself, maintain your boundaries, etc.
